I don’t know how I got here,
But I’m stuck staring at a broken mirror.
The reflection is false, and I know that’s the truth,
But I keep inventing new ways to ignore the proof.
I try to look at myself, but the cracks are in the way,
So I believe all the lies that the voices say.
Trying to fix the mirror still hasn’t helped,
So instead I put it back on the shelf.
But I've seen it,
And I hear it like they're spilling secrets.
By seeming true they echo in my head,
I start obsessing about what they've said.
I tell myself that they're not real,
But now the hurt is all that I feel.
I can't do anything, but I can't give in,
Because I don't think I'll ever be forgiven.
I have to live my life the same,
With these feelings I can’t bear to name.
“Work first,” has been ingrained in my brain,
But ignoring the pain doesn’t make it wane,
Because I notice it over and over
Like a merry-go-round, never getting closer.
And each time the fear builds more and more
Until I’m curled up in a ball on the floor.