Bi the way, bisexuality isn’t what you think

Harleigh Wiesenbach

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Features Editor

  Bisexual Visibility Day, also known as bisexuality day, is the day when all bisexuals and bisexual allies around the world celebrate bisexual history, culture, and their fellow bisexuals. It takes place on September 23 and is the best day to walk up to your local bisexual and worship them. Make sure you come bearing purple, pink, and blue flowers and waving a bi pride flag. I’m kidding. Even if you’re not bisexual yourself, it’s a great day to acknowledge that bisexuals exist and that you are supportive.

  Bisexuality is the attraction to two different genders. Let’s think about it on a spectrum. If heterosexuality is on one end and homosexuality is on the other, bisexuality would probably be somewhere in the middle. However, it’s not always exactly in the middle, splitting it between 50% straight and 50% gay. Some bisexuals may lean towards their gender, so on the spectrum, they may consider themselves more gay than straight. But others might lean towards the opposite gender, so they may consider themselves more straight than gay. They are still bisexual no matter which way you split it because it is still the attraction to two different genders.

  This is only an example, however, because there are many different genders out there. Not all bisexuals are attracted to just males and females. For example, someone who is attracted to genderfluids (those who switch their gender identity between two or more different genders on a daily basis) and agenders (those who don’t identify as any gender) is just as bisexual as someone attracted to males and females.

  Bisexuality is also often confused with pansexuality, which is the attraction to someone regardless of their gender orientation. Meaning, they are attracted to more than two genders. Got it all straight? No? Good, because it’s not very straight. Think of it this way: bi means two while pan means kitchen appliances. Pansexuals are not attracted to kitchen appliances. That was a joke.

  All jokes aside, I identify as bisexual. I’ve been out for a while, so it’s nothing new to anyone who knows me. On the spectrum, I’m probably more in the middle. I don’t really know who I lean more towards, and I don’t really care to know. That being said, while I consider myself bisexual, by definition someone might consider me more pansexual as I don’t really care what gender someone is for me to date them. However, I identify as bisexual because I feel as though it fits me better and that is what makes me more comfortable. This is what works for me personally. It’s perfectly acceptable to “technically” be considered pan and identify as bi, or “technically” be considered bi and identify as pan. The definitions aren’t meant to be constricting. They’re only there to help us understand each other, because in the end, it’s all about what feels comfortable for you.

  Personally, I don’t get a lot of grief from my sexuality, but I know there are people out there who do. Believe it or not, we even get talked down to in the Lesbian Gay Bisexual Trans + (LGBT+) community, and bisexual is in the name. There’s a lot of common misconceptions out there about bisexuals, so as someone who identifies as bisexual, I’m going to do my best to clear some of these up. For starters, one misconception is that because we like two genders we’re “greedy” or “cheaters.” But in reality, we aren’t more likely to cheat than anyone else. If you don’t trust me enough to be loyal to you, then I don’t want to date you either.

  Another big misconception is that once we’re dating one gender, we aren’t bisexual anymore. For example, let’s say I’m dating a guy. Since I’m female, someone might think “oh, so you’re straight now?” But if I’m dating a girl, they might think “oh, so you’re a lesbian now?” Both of those statements are false. No matter what gender I date, it doesn’t change the fact that I identify as bisexual. The person I’m dating doesn’t change my sexual orientation.

  “But aren’t you just confused?” The answer is no. Bisexual is not a term to be used to describe someone who is unsure of who they like. If I was unsure of who I liked, I would consider myself questioning. I’m not confused about my sexual orientation just like homosexuals, pansexuals, heterosexuals, or any other sexual orientations aren’t confused. I know who I love, and I’m proud of it.

  In the end, whether you’re gay, straight, bi, pan, or any other sexual orientation, I hope you can agree that we all love who we want to love. No one should be discriminated for that. There are no rules to love, and love is beautiful.

  Hello! I’m Harleigh Wiesenbach and this is my second year as features editor on the Montour Monitor. My sophomore year I worked on the centerspread each month as the centerspread editor, so I’m no stranger to the newspaper staff. Unfortunately, this is my senior year, but I plan on making it amazing by working hard on our issues each month and making as many new ideas get put into action as possible! So keep an eye out for all of our work; we really work hard each month to make sure we produce great daily articles and amazing monthly issues on our website.

  Not only am I involved with my school’s newspaper, I’m also a member of Poetry Club, Lost Arts Club, Girl Up, GSA, and Stand Together as well as play trumpet in marching band. Based on that, I’m sure that you can figure out that I’m a huge fan of poetry, although I love to read books as well. My favorite genre is modern fantasy but I’ll read just about anything. My favorite series is The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare. Other than reading, I also love to knit, draw, and write in my free time.

  Another passion of mine is mental health. I want to be a type of psychologist/therapist once I graduate, although I’m not 100% sure what type as of yet. I love helping others, especially when it comes to cheering them up and talking about their issues.

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