Car Ride to Be Broken- modeled after Suzanne Vega's Tom's Diner

I am looking

Out the window

In the backseat

Of this car


On this summer

Day is too perfect

Is too sunny

Is too blue


I am shaking

In the backseat

With my hands

Grasping the arm rest


And my eyes

Grasping the

Roadside flowers

I am not ready


I am begging

The sun to

Hold on tighter

I am not ready


My phone buzzes

And my best friends

Tell me that

They love me


I fiddle for my

White apple earbuds

Which are in

My pink overnight bag


I press play and listen

with eyes closed

To my favorite prayer

For the last time


In the corner I

Catch a reflection

That will never

Be the same


And In the rear view

Mirror I catch

My mother’s eyes

They apologize


She stretches

Her open hands

To hold my own

And smiles


In my head

I play over

My last meal

I am hungry


How far away

Are we from

The hospital

5 minutes?


Away from

The hospital

Where I

Will be broken


I wonder

For how long

I will be

broken?


I need to move

My body while

I still can

But this seat belt


Holds me

Down so

I let loose

My hair instead


I wonder if

I took everything

For granted

Is it too late?


This car

Feels smaller

Than everything

Around it


Did the sky

Slow down

Just for me?

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